Scrolling Saturday- Modest New Mom, Oxymoron?

This week, my Scrolling Saturday is from November 2006.

Childbirth changes us. Now, I know, you're thinking- whoa, big insight there. But childbirth changes us in one way we don't usually anticipate. We know our bodies will change. We know our motherly instincts will kick in. We know our capacity to love (and fear) will increase. But most pregnant women don't think to themselves, "hmm.. in just 9 short months my every modicum of modesty will be gone." But it's true, childbirth changes our modesty.
I've known women who, pre-childbirth, were incredibly modest. They would blush whenever "Aunt Flo" was the topic of conversation, they would never, ever discuss sex with their girlfriends. They probably did the turn-off-the-lights, mad-dash, flying-leap-into-bed before even starting the baby-making process. A few hours of labor and childbirth, however, and they're ready to talk.

"Well, my mucus plug broke on Tuesday morning, and I had some bloody show the following 2 days......"

Whoa, Mike - too much information! Now the woman who wouldn't change her shirt in front of her best friend, is breastfeeding in front of said best friend's husband.

Now, I'll admit, I'm the worst at sharing war stories. But, I was never modest to begin with, so I don't think my friends are much surprised when I whip out my boob to feed the baby in public. But when you have a chick who calls farts "rosebuds," it just seems a little weird to be discussing how she had a bowel movement while pushing.

And the vocabulary that comes along with pregnancy is something else. It's like this secret club complete with passwords. The first level is sweet and innocent; just enough to make you think, "aawww, I want a baby." Words like, "nursing", and "womb."

The next level is for paying members only, "amniocentisis", "placenta", "postpartum."

And then there are the words that make you sound like a gourmand. "Yes, I'll have the leukorrhea with colostrum sauce, no lanugo, and a glass of Perineal please." And once you're in the club, you're a lifetime member. Start talking about childbirth with any group of women, and every one has a story to tell, even if it's 45 years old and much embellished.

The relaxed modesty immediately following childbirth doesn't always stick. I know many women who've gone back to their discreet ways. In later years, our childbirth stories will leave out the mucus plug, vaginal tears, and inflamed milk duct details. But for that short window, we all share the same bawdiness....and the secret handshake!